How do you know when to say NO! Or set healthy boundaries with someone you care about? In any relationship, there are expectations and requests. Sometimes these expectations are reasonable, mutual, and beneficial. Other times the person may be asking too much, or at least too much for now.
If you feel that you are not able to choose either a yes or a no, you are not exercising your free will in the relationship, and this will lead to resentment over time. Then you will begin distancing yourself, either consciously or unconsciously. But if you are able to politely decline a request from time to time, you will not feel trapped. People who feel trapped will eventually feel that they have to bolt from the connection and the relationship, even if they care about the person.
We all have times when we feel our personal resources are low. We feel like we are literally on “empty.” Like a gas gauge on a car, with the needle on “E,” we can’t run anymore. We can’t give any more to our partner, and we just need to withdraw. In a good relationship, this can be handled in a healthy way by setting healthy boundaries. The trick is using good communication skills, which are clear, direct, and polite.
Recognize that there are some ways that are more respectful than others when you need to set a healthy boundary in a relationship that you care about. The first step is to recognize that the person has a need, desire, or expectation of you – one that you may not want to respond to.
Here are Six Tips for How to Say No:
How do you know when to say No? Listen to your body. When your body says, “No.” That’s your answer; It’s a no! Even if your head thinks you “should” say yes. If you are really paying attention to your core, your inner truth, your body will give you the sensation of no, and that is your answer. But you must pay attention to your gut. The mind can lie because we have all kinds of “shoulds” running around in our mental programming. But the body is reliable if you are listening to your truth.
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